Howdy! This week starts my third week back to work with students. As you may remember, I started this year with mixed feelings, anxiety, and a bit of trepidation. Now that I've been at it for two weeks, I can say it's not THAT terrible. No, I still don't enjoy sitting through high school classes. Yes, I miss spending time working closely with my coworkers. No, it's not the end of the world. Yes, there are aspects that I actually enjoy. My day seems to go incredibly fast for the most part (some classes can be more boring and slow). I am learning some things on a fairly daily basis. High school was a very long time ago for me, so some of it's like new! I'm in all of the typical core classes and a couple of fun electives. I've never really cared for English much but the teacher focuses on writing skills a lot so who knows, maybe I'll become a better writer! This is the second time in the past 4 years that I've sat through World History. Not much has changed there except the teacher and the detail included in each lesson. And oh my... science. Never been a favorite of mine; except for maybe the fun labs. And even then, I found the processing of labs blah. It's obvious that over the years, my mind has shifted gears. My creativity and inference skills have nose-dived in areas of little interest to me. Having to create and infer for myself and THEN explain in a way that the students I work with can understand is extremely challenging! So maybe, just maybe, sitting through all of these classes will be good for me. Maybe, just maybe, it will sharpen the skills that have dulled with age. In conclusion, this change in job responsibilities may not be the death of me, but might actually be good for me. At least a little bit. Only time will tell. But in the meantime, prayers for patience and the ability to aid my students in learning the best way possible would be greatly appreciated!
Outside of work, things are busy as usual. I've been going through boxes that have been packed up for at least the past three years to divide up into trash, garage sale, and keep piles. Needless to say, my room is quite a mess of random stacks. On the upside, I've officially emptied two boxes. On the downside, I need to start packing my books and other things into those boxes to move to the next house. I've also continued to make contact with possible financial partners to support me while I serve in Thailand. I've had some success and have actually jumped almost 20% in less than two months! Yay! I'm no longer stuck! That's a HUGE thanks! I still have a ways to go, but I will keep pressing on! If you know of other people or churches who may be interested in hearing my story, let me know!
Feeling a little lonely lately, I've tried to take advantage of time spent with friends. I've actually had quite a few opportunities the past few weeks. It's been fun and I've enjoyed listening and being a part of those groups, but something is still missing. I think I'm just low on the quality time spent in real depth of conversation. Even though the fun conversations are nice and bring about lots of laughter, I'm a person who is filled by talking at the heart level. In groups, that's just not a real possibility for me. I'm more of a one-on-one to tiny group person where there is space to share. It also may have something to do with not having that constant time of community at work anymore with my coworkers.
That brings me to this weekend. It is my once a month spiritual direction class. There is always depth there. Although I have quite a bit of homework to do before then, it will be a wonderful day. In spiritual direction we learn how to sit with and listen well to others as they explore the depths of their heart and try to deepen their relationship with God. It's a three year program and I'm just starting the final year. When I first began, I had hoped to make it through the first year before leaving for Thailand. As the first year came and went I found myself still here and starting the second year. At that point, I had really planned on making it through the second year and leaving for Thailand before the third year started. As you can tell, I'm still here. MY plans have not come to fruition. I stress the word MY because my plans are not always His plans. Isaiah 55:8 says, "'My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,' says the Lord. 'And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.'" Which then reminds me of Ephesians 3:20, "Now all glory to God, who is able, through His mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think." This is my prayer. These verses give me hope. I may not have made it yet, but I will make it at some point according to God's great plan. So year three, here I come. Obviously, the Lord has a plan and it includes year three of the spiritual direction program. Maybe only half, or maybe all of it. Only God knows.
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| These are my wonderful spiritual direction classmates. |
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